[0.0s] Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[30.5s] Fire Breath.
[31.5s] Great, yeah, Donnie lets loose his Fire Breath and narrowly missing Thaddeus.
[35.5s] It's like, ooh, spicy.
[37.5s] And the hedges catch fire.
[39.5s] Would I be able to Lightning Breath?
[42.0s] A very slight singe appears on these beautiful flowers.
[45.5s] And it is the flowers?
[48.5s] Thaddeus takes eight piercing damage and until he's cured, his hit point maximum is reduced.
[56.0s] Don't fail your rolls, guys.
[58.0s] I'm going to keep going at that one and attack it two more times.
[61.5s] You strike into this plant multiple times and you're like, these plants can take a beating.
[67.0s] It's Flamikinskin's turn.
[69.0s] She's like, maybe, maybe the pearl is what we need.
[72.0s] Maybe if we just hit the same one until it fucking dies.
[78.0s] I was so inspired by Flamikinskin's idea.
[80.0s] So I guess I'm doing like vaulting over them with flips with my sword on fire.
[84.5s] And I probably just like drive it in.
[86.5s] You stab in and this flower goes up in flames and the pearl falls from it down onto the ground.
[93.5s] Okay, I pick it up.
[94.5s] And you all kind of cluster together and make it back out and into the sundial room.
[99.5s] If she's out for 12 hours, will she come back to her Jade Serpentine form with me?
[104.5s] Or is she just going to fall from the sky?
[106.5s] She turns into from the Jade Serpentine form.
[109.5s] So the Jade Serpentine form lands wherever she lands.
[113.5s] My God, you guys are on a clock.
[116.5s] Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[118.5s] We're a D&D fifth edition actual play podcast and I'm your dungeon master Russ More.
[122.5s] And with me today is Amy More.
[124.5s] Oh, yeah, I am.
[126.0s] I've got Rum and I play Thea Amastasia.
[129.0s] This is a good combination.
[131.0s] We'll see.
[132.0s] Also with us, Carla Johnson.
[134.5s] Hey, I play Nulara Moonbrook.
[137.0s] Oh, sorry, we were doing drinks.
[138.5s] I have water and I play Nulara Moonbrook.
[144.0s] So I'm the lame one.
[145.0s] I had to make the lame noise.
[148.5s] And Tom Laird.
[150.5s] Oh, yeah, I've got Ginger Ale and I play Flynn Firebeard.
[155.0s] We have a good assortment of drinks tonight.
[158.5s] It's good.
[159.5s] It's really good.
[161.0s] Don't know where to go.
[162.0s] Well, I mean, we used to talk about snacks a lot.
[164.0s] It's true.
[165.0s] But now I don't think any of us eat while we're doing this.
[168.5s] Oh, no.
[169.0s] Yeah, I try to curb the eating.
[171.0s] Russ makes faces.
[172.0s] Tom starts with pudding.
[173.5s] Russ sends death threats.
[175.5s] So you do that these days.
[177.5s] Yeah.
[178.0s] Not to you guys, because I can edit out your shit.
[182.0s] Just Amy.
[183.0s] So unless you have like a solidarity pact on snacks, then.
[187.0s] Which we should have.
[188.5s] I think we do.
[189.5s] You know how sad I would be looking over watching Carla eat that bacon flavored popcorn?
[194.5s] Just like.
[195.0s] Remember that stuff?
[196.0s] Okay, we're getting sidetracked already.
[197.5s] We're 10 seconds in.
[198.5s] Oh, boy.
[199.5s] I had cheesecake today.
[200.5s] Just saying.
[202.0s] It wasn't Tom's.
[203.0s] It wasn't his.
[204.0s] So good.
[205.0s] Sorry.
[206.0s] We're going to try and keep it quick today and get right to the game.
[209.0s] Sure we are.
[210.0s] Fuck it, guys.
[211.0s] Let's play D&D.
[212.0s] Okay.
[213.0s] Look at that.
[214.0s] He was so tricky.
[215.0s] He just went.
[216.0s] He said it.
[217.0s] So Tom couldn't interrupt him.
[218.0s] I only interrupted him like two weeks in a row.
[221.0s] But now he's scared.
[223.0s] Now it's your thing.
[224.0s] And I have to watch out for guys like you.
[226.0s] It's not my thing.
[228.0s] My mother warned me about guys like you.
[231.5s] Mothers, lock up your sons.
[233.5s] Hey, did you guys remember that we're in a death maze?
[236.5s] Oh, right.
[237.5s] I had sort of forgotten until I sent Russ a message earlier about something.
[242.5s] And then he was like, we've got to plan some more death maze.
[245.5s] And I was like, oh, God, we're trying to solve a riddle and it's not working.
[251.5s] I mean, we're collecting stones or like precious.
[254.5s] I don't know.
[255.5s] Pearl is in a stone.
[256.5s] But you know what I mean?
[257.5s] Semi-precious items.
[261.0s] And so that's going great.
[262.0s] I don't think any of us have a single clue about how to move on.
[268.0s] But I listened to everything thinking like maybe it's really obvious from the outside
[273.0s] in, right?
[274.0s] Like I'm listening to it.
[275.0s] I'm like, I don't know what the fuck is going on.
[277.0s] No idea.
[278.0s] I mean, thank you.
[279.0s] No idea.
[280.0s] I did that too.
[281.0s] I totally listened thinking that.
[282.0s] Yeah.
[283.0s] I was like, oh, maybe that was been like a couple of weeks since we played.
[286.0s] Yeah.
[287.0s] Like maybe maybe something will spark.
[288.0s] And I was listening to it.
[289.5s] And I was like, nope, still doesn't make any fucking sense.
[291.5s] No, I think it's completely random.
[293.5s] I think it's legit a death mace trap.
[295.5s] I think we just have to keep going until we get all the stones and something magical
[300.5s] will happen.
[301.5s] I'll get my fucking owl back.
[303.5s] Easy, easy.
[306.5s] Deep breath.
[307.5s] Sorry.
[308.5s] I got upset re-listening to that episode.
[311.5s] I was uncomfortable listening to it because I remember seeing your face and then Russ's
[315.5s] like stone face next to you.
[319.0s] I know.
[320.0s] It's like, am I going to get it back?
[322.0s] Is guacamole just going to turn back into a jade serpentine and that my little serpentine
[328.0s] owl be lost forever?
[331.0s] What?
[334.0s] Anywho.
[335.0s] I don't know.
[336.0s] Anywho.
[337.0s] With all those big questions.
[338.0s] I guess that was our recap.
[340.0s] I guess so.
[342.0s] It got real and now we're back.
[344.0s] From weeks ago, Amy's still harboring this.
[347.5s] She probably just listened to it like yesterday, right?
[349.5s] Yeah.
[350.5s] It's true.
[351.5s] I did.
[352.5s] Okay.
[353.5s] So if you recall, you had defeated the garden, the garden riddle.
[361.5s] Well, if I defeated you mean ran away from, then yes.
[364.5s] Yes, it's true.
[365.5s] We did steal a pearl before we left.
[367.5s] You managed to get out, therefore defeated.
[369.5s] Okay.
[370.5s] Yeah, sure.
[371.5s] Right.
[372.5s] And then you ended up back in the sundial room to which somebody had a great idea
[376.0s] that you should go down, go down B, I believe, which brought you back to the sundial room.
[382.0s] And now the shadows are pointed at now.
[386.0s] I was trying to figure out a better way to do this because I feel like maybe you guys
[390.0s] are stuck on like the values of it, but I don't know a better way to do it.
[396.0s] So we're just going to keep going with it.
[398.0s] The shadows are pointed at the A, D and F.
[402.5s] Guys, we haven't been down this way and I point to the corner, which is F.
[408.5s] Let's, I don't want to wait in this room any longer.
[412.5s] I think we just need to keep going and get through here.
[415.5s] Let's give it a shot.
[416.5s] Hold on.
[417.5s] We're going down F?
[418.5s] Okay.
[419.5s] No, that's fine.
[420.5s] We can go down F.
[421.5s] What's F?
[422.5s] We can go down this way.
[423.5s] I mean, you said F.
[425.5s] So I assume you were just saying this like a fucking great way to go.
[429.5s] It is.
[430.5s] It's a fucking great way to go.
[432.0s] Let's get fucked.
[435.0s] Yeah, the fuck room.
[436.0s] All right, here we go.
[438.0s] Oh, boy, things have taken a turn.
[443.0s] Jesus, Flaming Kins pops in and it's just fucking aggressive immediately.
[450.0s] Aggressively sexual.
[452.0s] Either aggressively aggressive or aggressively sexual.
[455.0s] She doesn't really do anything part way.
[457.0s] She's really taking the mantle over from Thea on that one.
[459.5s] All of her t-shirts would be really inappropriate.
[463.5s] Or they'd be super cute because there would just be pictures of her.
[466.5s] Come on, Glass Houses, we do sell a t-shirt that has the word fuck on it, so let's not.
[471.5s] Okay.
[473.5s] Imagine a little green goblin and a door with a label on the door that just said fuck room.
[480.5s] Oh, you got Carla mid-drink.
[482.5s] That was great.
[484.5s] I almost died.
[486.5s] Oh, my God.
[488.0s] Can that be her next shirt?
[490.0s] So if you're drawing fan art, a little cute goblin beside a fuck room would probably be next.
[498.0s] Hold on.
[499.0s] We don't need to know what happens in the room.
[501.0s] A closed door.
[503.0s] Just a door.
[504.0s] Yeah, I don't want to see the room.
[505.0s] The mystery.
[506.0s] The mystery shades of Flaming Kins.
[508.0s] I don't want to yuck any goblin yum.
[511.0s] She can do whatever she wants.
[513.0s] But I don't want to see what's inside that fuck room.
[516.5s] It can be private.
[518.5s] Also, I think we all have a very good idea of what that room would look like and I'd
[522.5s] be horrified to see it for real.
[524.5s] Someone draw that out.
[525.5s] I mean, if somebody drew it, you're still entered in the contest.
[528.5s] It's true.
[529.5s] Be as explicit as you want, I guess.
[531.5s] Whatever you're comfortable with.
[532.5s] You knew you.
[533.5s] Yeah.
[534.5s] Yeah.
[535.5s] All right, so down the corner way then.
[539.5s] So you carry down and it takes you roughly minute, minute and a half and you enter into
[549.2s] an area where there's a placid pond that fills the center of this open space.
[557.0s] A stout pagoda rises from a huge boulder that stands in the water like an island.
[563.6s] An arch bridge crosses the water to the pagoda whose red roof is held up by six
[568.3s] sturdy pillars and capped with carved fish.
[572.9s] A human male wearing yellow silk robes embroidered with red and gold fish stands in the pagoda.
[581.2s] You hear exotic music being played on a stringed instrument.
[588.7s] The robed figure bows to you as you enter the area and he begins to walk into the
[596.1s] and sits down on a boulder where it protrudes from the floor of the pagoda.
[601.1s] Can I look?
[604.5s] So you said it's a placid lake that we see, so no movement in the water.
[611.1s] But it's not Lake Placid.
[612.7s] Oh God, I hope not.
[614.5s] The giant crocodile comes out of here, it's gonna be scary.
[617.4s] I start to walk up the bridge to talk to the man in the yellow robes and I say,
[624.8s] Excuse me, are you able to help us?
[627.3s] And I'm right behind her and I say, hey there, koi boy.
[630.4s] Is he koi?
[631.4s] Well, no, he's not like koi fish on his.
[636.7s] Do you say ahoy?
[637.7s] Oh, that's even better.
[638.7s] Ahoy koi boy.
[639.7s] We're a team.
[648.1s] As you step closer to the pagoda, you can see what's inside the pagoda and you
[652.5s] see where normally it would be wood, it's a rock garden of decorative stones and brushed
[660.6s] sand. A charcoal pit smolders beside the boulder where the man sits.
[665.8s] You ask him, but he does not speak and just looks like he's patiently staring at you.
[673.9s] He's a human?
[675.4s] Yep.
[676.1s] Did he react like he just, nothing, flat, no reaction?
[679.7s] He just has a polite smile on, but he's just looking at you, no reaction.
[685.6s] Do you understand common?
[687.6s] He doesn't respond to that.
[689.3s] I say that again in Celestial.
[694.2s] That's less majestic than I would have imagined.
[696.6s] Yeah, that's not quite how I pictured it.
[698.7s] That's like a god-like language, right?
[699.9s] Sort of fish-like, which seems appropriate for the setting.
[702.9s] Right.
[704.8s] He just remains seated on his boulder.
[707.4s] I approach him and I look at the smoldering coals he said were beside him.
[714.4s] Sure, so you've stepped into the pagoda?
[715.9s] Yes, I am in the pagoda.
[717.8s] I think we're going to pray.
[718.9s] That's what happens in a pagoda.
[720.0s] Oh, we're going to fight?
[722.5s] Maybe both.
[724.3s] We're going to crouch some tigers and hide some dragons?
[727.1s] Yep.
[727.6s] Is it just Thea stepping in or is anybody else coming with her or is everybody?
[730.9s] How big is the pagoda?
[733.0s] I know you said six pillars holding it up, so it must be pretty big, but.
[736.5s] 15 feet by 15 feet.
[740.5s] So certainly big enough for all of us.
[743.2s] I clamber up on a stone and sit there.
[746.4s] Yeah, I will enter as well.
[748.9s] As everybody enters the pagoda,
[751.5s] the man gives a brief smile and proffers silk cushions to everybody.
[757.2s] That's so nice.
[758.5s] Is he using a silk cushion?
[760.1s] No, no, he's just seated on the boulder.
[762.2s] Then I refuse his offer and just sit down.
[766.0s] It's on the silk cushion.
[767.1s] Like I'm good and I just sit down.
[769.5s] Thea gives a little like a little bow as he did to us when we came up and I sit on it.
[775.5s] What color is my silk cushion?
[776.9s] Red with gold embroidery.
[780.5s] Is everyone's that color?
[781.6s] Yep.
[781.9s] Oh, OK, I sit on it.
[784.1s] I was going to trade these with someone if I thought there was a better color.
[786.3s] They all appear to be the same fabric.
[788.3s] So sorry, Flint was the only one who didn't take a cushion?
[790.8s] Yeah, I'm a dwarf.
[791.7s] I'm very used to sitting on stones.
[793.8s] Sure.
[794.6s] He looks at you and gives a kind of like an all right kind of look.
[800.8s] You'll get hemorrhoids sitting on cold stone like this.
[803.3s] That's what he's thinking inside.
[804.4s] It's well, it seems quite warm, so he then waves his hand
[809.7s] and an iron tea kettle rises up from beneath the embers.
[815.3s] The kettle resembles a scowling face with thick features.
[821.3s] Do I recognize his face?
[823.3s] Can I roll for like, I don't know, it'd probably be religion.
[829.6s] I'd say probably perception or arcana.
[833.1s] Maybe it's your long-lost mentor kettle face.
[835.7s] Oh, motherfucker.
[838.1s] Three plus eight.
[839.9s] Eleven.
[840.9s] You look at it and it doesn't jump out to you.
[842.9s] Is anybody else intrigued by the kettle as it rises from the embers?
[847.7s] Sure, sure.
[849.0s] Fourteen.
[853.8s] Nineteen.
[855.1s] Oh, well.
[856.5s] Well, you don't recognize it, Thea.
[859.5s] Nularaaaa and Flint, you recognize it at what may be a dale.
[867.3s] Dale.
[868.9s] Which is...
[869.9s] One day sale.
[874.1s] Which is an elemental creature.
[877.3s] Has to do with earth and stone.
[879.0s] The man pours a clear water from a clay jug into the kettle and adds tea leaves to it.
[886.9s] He bows to the kettle and appears to show great reverence to the vessel.
[892.1s] Then lowers his head in meditation.
[896.1s] Soon steam begins to rise from the kettle.
[900.1s] What kind of tea we having?
[902.1s] He appears to be deep in meditation.
[904.8s] Thea does a thing where like you look around like you're like,
[911.0s] the pagoda and the stone and the kettle.
[915.2s] Like when you're in the doctor's office and you don't have your phone and you just are like,
[919.1s] I've never looked so intensely at a small room before.
[922.1s] There's nothing to see in here.
[924.1s] Reading pamphlets.
[925.6s] Yeah, the weird posters they have about if you have sleep apnea or not.
[930.7s] And you've reread the one poster like seven times.
[933.4s] Yeah.
[933.8s] And then you're pretty sure you've got sleep apnea because you've read it so many times.
[940.9s] I mean, I came in here to talk about my headaches,
[943.5s] but I think I may have sleep apnea.
[948.0s] Is anybody else doing anything during this time?
[950.8s] I don't know.
[952.3s] Yeah, I don't know.
[953.2s] No, I don't think so.
[954.1s] I'm a bit gun shy to like do stuff.
[957.6s] It's off putting because he's not talking.
[959.1s] Yes.
[959.8s] I feel like the ball's in his court.
[961.9s] Like we have nothing to say or do.
[963.7s] It's like, OK, well, I guess this is we're literally waiting for water to boil here.
[968.0s] And guys, nobody look at the kettle.
[971.2s] A watched pot never boils.
[973.6s] That's a good point.
[974.3s] Pretty sure that's what we're waiting for.
[976.1s] I do have this set of dice that we could play an excellent dice game with.
[983.2s] I'm in.
[983.7s] Go for it.
[986.1s] As you begin to start playing your dice game,
[989.0s] Mackenzie's like, so how do you play this fucking game?
[992.3s] Oh, and I say, oh, this is the best game ever.
[995.8s] You basically.
[996.9s] And then the kettle starts boiling and it's like, oh, too, too late.
[1002.9s] The steam begins to rise and fill the area of the pagoda.
[1007.7s] Like there's there's lots of it coming out of this kettle.
[1011.0s] As you begin talking about this dice game,
[1014.1s] shooting up from the ground between the pillars, walls of stone enclose the pagoda, which begins
[1023.2s] to trap the steam inside.
[1026.4s] Guys, we're going on a vision quest.
[1028.3s] We're hot boxing, y'all.
[1031.7s] The man looks up and gives a brief smile and begins to sink into the boulder.
[1039.3s] Once he disappears, you see a bright light jump inside the tea kettle.
[1045.7s] Everybody make a constitution saving throw against poison.
[1049.7s] Oh, I can't be poisoned.
[1051.0s] And I'm resistant to poison.
[1052.5s] I also rolled a 16, though, and plus my con is three.
[1056.1s] So that's a 19.
[1057.2s] I wasted a fucking 19 on something that can't even.
[1059.8s] All right.
[1060.3s] It's all right.
[1061.3s] I got a 19 as well.
[1063.4s] Copycat.
[1065.5s] I have a plus four bonus, though, so it was only a 15.
[1069.7s] 16.
[1070.6s] Does Thaddeus need to roll?
[1072.2s] Yeah, everybody's got to roll.
[1073.3s] Everybody's in there, which they both save.
[1076.5s] As the walls shoot up with a huge and the man disappears, you breathe deep this steam
[1086.3s] and it doesn't feel right.
[1088.1s] All of you saved and those that can't be affected by poison aren't affected by poison,
[1094.8s] but you get the feeling that it is something that is not beneficial to your health,
[1101.4s] so to speak.
[1102.5s] And Thaddeus walks over to where the man picked up the tea leaves,
[1106.7s] who you now know is not a man, but perhaps a day himself.
[1110.5s] And he looks at the tea leaves and he says,
[1114.3s] well, this is Drake's war.
[1117.7s] And it is potentially lethal to those of us who aren't poison savvy.
[1125.6s] Roll for initiative.
[1127.7s] We're going to fight steam.
[1128.9s] Are we fighting the teapot?
[1130.7s] Yeah, we are.
[1132.3s] It's eight.
[1133.5s] Is it short and stout?
[1135.1s] 24.
[1136.8s] Show me where it's handle is.
[1138.0s] I'm going to punch it in its spout.
[1141.3s] Do great bedtime nursery rhymes.
[1145.0s] New Laura, you're up first.
[1147.1s] Okay, I guess.
[1150.5s] So you are surrounded in a pagoda with steam,
[1153.3s] stone walls, poisonous steam filling this room.
[1158.3s] What do you do?
[1159.4s] And it's coming from the kettle.
[1162.1s] It's coming from the kettle.
[1163.4s] Fucking murder that kettle, New Laura.
[1164.5s] At the beginning of your turn, sorry,
[1166.5s] you must make a constitution saving throw.
[1169.0s] I'm so glad I don't have to do that, guys.
[1171.4s] I'm not trying to be braggy.
[1172.9s] I just run real shitty and be fucking dead.
[1175.9s] Um, do you mean like that two I just rolled,
[1179.6s] which will get me a four?
[1182.4s] I believe it's a 20, Carla, two with a zero.
[1186.5s] Yeah, let's raise zero on it.
[1188.1s] Right.
[1189.3s] Yeah.
[1190.8s] So this is where I, this is where I die, guys.
[1194.1s] So you, as you jump up and are trying to assess your situation,
[1199.2s] you take 13 poison damage.
[1201.2s] Oh shit.
[1204.0s] Blap.
[1205.0s] Does.
[1205.7s] So you begin to cough and heave
[1207.8s] as you're trying to evaluate what you should do next.
[1210.0s] Oh goodness, but she still gets to do next, right?
[1212.0s] Yeah, absolutely.
[1212.9s] Is this magical damage or non-magical damage?
[1215.6s] Is this magic steam or just poison steam?
[1218.6s] Because I'm, I'm resistant if it's non-magical.
[1221.7s] This is why I'm asking.
[1223.0s] There's like a mask on my, on my armor.
[1226.6s] Yes, it is non-magical.
[1228.0s] So you would get half of that.
[1230.2s] So seven, do we round up?
[1233.7s] Six, round down.
[1235.7s] Okay.
[1236.2s] So I take some poison damage and then I'm going to,
[1241.8s] fuck, I'm going to use my foot to try and kick the kettle off.
[1246.0s] Is it floating?
[1247.0s] It's floating, isn't it?
[1248.7s] What's floating?
[1249.4s] The kettle.
[1249.8s] Sorry, the kettle?
[1250.5s] Yeah.
[1251.1s] The kettle is sitting in the embers at the moment.
[1254.0s] Okay.
[1255.1s] Then I am going to use my spear to try to like get it out
[1261.1s] because if it stops steaming, it'll stop like infusing the air with poison, right?
[1266.2s] That's logic.
[1267.6s] Take away the heat source.
[1268.9s] As you go to lift this, some spills out onto the embers themselves
[1274.9s] and you notice that the face of the kettle,
[1279.3s] you notice it's slightly animated and make a perception check.
[1285.0s] 24.
[1285.9s] And you notice that its eyes are looking around the pagoda,
[1290.0s] but you move it off of the embers and place it down.
[1293.6s] Steam still begins to come out of the kettle.
[1298.0s] What else is like sitting around?
[1299.4s] Just rocks?
[1300.1s] Just like giant boulders?
[1302.2s] There is a single giant boulder and then the floor is like a rock garden,
[1307.4s] decorative stones, smaller, you know.
[1309.9s] But we have no access to the lake anymore, correct?
[1312.2s] Because there's stone walls around the walls of the pagoda?
[1314.6s] Totally closed off.
[1316.7s] In the ceiling too?
[1318.6s] Ceiling has its red roof.
[1321.4s] Then I am going to ready an action because I still have another one.
[1329.5s] So I will like, do I have to say what that is?
[1332.2s] I've never readied an action before.
[1333.8s] If you ready an action, it's an if and then.
[1336.9s] So if something happens, then you do something.
[1340.5s] So you need to set those terms.
[1342.8s] If there becomes an enemy I can stab, I want to stab it.
[1348.2s] Yeah, seems fair.
[1350.3s] So before your next turn, if that happens, you will do that immediately.
[1356.4s] So it stops everything and you do that action
[1358.6s] and then it gets back into initiative order.
[1361.2s] Donnie.
[1361.7s] Oh, oh, this is perfect because I was going to ask someone to pee on the thing,
[1365.5s] but instead I'm going to get Donnie to pee on the thing.
[1369.0s] Nice.
[1369.4s] I guess like, yeah.
[1370.6s] This is like an episode 14 throwback when you asked if Donnie could pee on a statue.
[1374.7s] Right? Yes.
[1376.2s] Roll for pee.
[1377.3s] This time it makes a little bit more sense because I'm trying to like,
[1381.3s] it's I'm trying to like actually do something, not just be a dick.
[1385.7s] Sure, roll to pee.
[1388.6s] OK, what's my pee roll?
[1391.0s] Make a dexterity roll.
[1392.3s] OK, hey guys, Donnie rolled a 20 on his pee roll.
[1397.9s] Yeah, he did.
[1399.1s] He unleashes the most glorious of pees.
[1402.1s] It's the first time.
[1402.9s] It is a righteous stream.
[1404.8s] Well.
[1405.0s] What is it?
[1405.5s] It was a 20, like a nat 20.
[1408.4s] So actually a 22.
[1410.6s] And I just want to remember this is the first time in game
[1414.2s] that Donnie has peed since he has taken his new form.
[1417.7s] He's peed on the show, like weirdly several times, more than anyone else.
[1425.9s] OK, explain to me how Donnie's pee is so critical.
[1429.5s] I don't know.
[1436.3s] Well, I guess I do know he's really going to motivate some action here
[1439.8s] when he pees on that kettle that has the face of the day on it.
[1445.0s] I can't imagine that's going to do nothing.
[1449.0s] I can see the tales are going to tell about it now.
[1451.4s] And his righteous golden stream shot forth onto the face of the evil day.
[1458.4s] OK, so he's peeing on the kettle.
[1462.7s] OK, well, because the kettle's off the fire now.
[1465.8s] So I don't need to care about putting the fire out.
[1469.2s] Sure.
[1469.8s] Yeah.
[1471.0s] Donnie lets forth a righteous stream.
[1474.7s] And it's like, you know, in Austin Powers, which is our other podcast,
[1478.8s] Mike Meyer's movies, how he wakes up from cryo state and just lets forth
[1484.2s] a righteous stream that just keeps going and going.
[1487.8s] And then stops and everyone thinks he's done and then goes.
[1491.7s] So now you have the issue of peeing onto a hot kettle
[1495.1s] and pee steam coming up into the room.
[1499.4s] Oh, is that? Oh, no.
[1501.1s] And those that are paying attention to the kettle notice a deeper scowl
[1505.9s] on the kettle itself and the smell of urine just permeating every single inch.
[1511.4s] There's so much urine.
[1513.2s] It was righteous in the closed room.
[1515.1s] Oh, geez.
[1516.8s] Sorry, I was supposed to make Donnie roll a Constitution saving throw as well.
[1520.0s] Oh, that is a 12.
[1525.4s] Yeah. So he's going to take 11 poison damage.
[1532.0s] But yeah, then let's forth this stream of pee.
[1534.4s] And now there's more pee vapor and there's still poison in the air.
[1538.6s] But the steam is slowing out of the kettle.
[1542.2s] Flint, make a Constitution saving throw, bud.
[1546.2s] Way ahead of us.
[1547.7s] 17. Donnie looks at Flint and is like, beat that.
[1553.1s] So you, sir, are going to take four for poison damage.
[1559.0s] And I'm only going to take two of that because I'm resistant to poison.
[1564.6s] OK, what are you going to do?
[1567.4s] I am going to take my bed roll out of my adventuring pack.
[1576.8s] Quickly open my canteen, douse it with water,
[1580.6s] and then throw it on top of the peak of her kettle.
[1587.1s] Thus smothering it with a wet blanket.
[1591.1s] Our problem solving skills are amazing.
[1595.4s] OK.
[1597.9s] OK, so yeah, sure.
[1600.2s] You don't need to roll anything for that.
[1601.8s] So you douse your bed roll and throw it on top.
[1604.4s] And it seems to smother the steam, but there's still steam in the air.
[1608.6s] Are you doing anything else with your 12 other actions or are you good for now?
[1611.9s] Can I pull out that fan that I was given and waft the steam away from people?
[1617.8s] I knew it.
[1618.6s] I knew that fan would come in handy.
[1620.3s] The fan was going to save the day.
[1621.4s] It was the best.
[1625.3s] It just keeps coming in handy over and over.
[1627.1s] So the entire room is filled with poison steam.
[1631.4s] So yes, you can fan away.
[1633.8s] It's a pretty big fan, if you recall.
[1635.8s] Sure. Yeah, I get it.
[1637.0s] So you're fanning.
[1638.0s] So you douse your bedroll, you throw it on top of the kettle,
[1641.2s] and then you begin just fanning the steam around,
[1643.7s] which is like when somebody farts and you start fanning it.
[1645.8s] I fan it away from people, Russ.
[1648.5s] Away from people.
[1652.0s] There's no windows or anything, though.
[1653.6s] So where's the steam going?
[1654.7s] There's six of you in a 15 by 15 room.
[1658.2s] So yeah, there's lots of room for it to go away from us.
[1664.2s] OK, sure. Yep.
[1665.2s] OK, good.
[1665.8s] Like I'm in front of Thaddeus blowing it away from him.
[1670.1s] Yeah, OK, I got it.
[1673.0s] OK, yeah, Thaddeus' turn.
[1674.3s] He's got to make a Constitution saving throw.
[1676.1s] I don't think he should have to,
[1677.4s] since the steam is no longer in his face.
[1681.7s] He's already taken a big breathful, though, so he's got to.
[1684.9s] Or at least he should get advantage.
[1688.6s] Your wrist.
[1689.2s] Oh, he doesn't need advantage.
[1690.3s] This is a 19.
[1693.8s] So he's going to take four poison damage.
[1696.1s] OK. And then he's going to get a turn.
[1699.3s] Maybe if we were to.
[1700.5s] Should he cast Fog Cloud and just add fog to this roost tapestry that we got going on?
[1705.8s] There is fog, there's urine, there's poison.
[1708.9s] Maybe if I were to like try to break our way out of here,
[1712.0s] I don't know, that seems like it might be an idea.
[1717.3s] No, no, I don't want us to keep fighting the kettle.
[1720.7s] I don't have that idea.
[1724.2s] If only one of us had an axe.
[1727.4s] Doesn't ring a bell.
[1729.7s] I have a ladder that turns into an axe.
[1731.7s] He had a bedroll.
[1732.7s] He had a bedroll in that moment.
[1734.4s] He left his axe outside the pagoda.
[1736.5s] That's right.
[1737.7s] All right.
[1738.1s] I am seeing a lot of spells for things that aren't going to help break through walls.
[1743.0s] Nothing that can like portal a thing into somewhere else.
[1747.0s] Oh, please, if he could have done that,
[1748.4s] he could have got us into the fucking tower.
[1750.8s] That's true.
[1751.8s] Well, maybe that is really doesn't pull his weight
[1755.0s] when it comes to coming up with plans, because, you know,
[1758.2s] he's maybe he could ready his action.
[1760.6s] What does this pass wall do, Russ?
[1765.3s] Magic.
[1767.0s] Wow.
[1767.4s] Thank you for that.
[1769.6s] Pass while allows you to pass through walls there, bud.
[1773.7s] Passage appears at a point of choice that you can see on a wooden plaster or stone surface,
[1779.3s] such as a wall, a ceiling, a floor within range and last for the duration.
[1784.3s] Seems like a good choice.
[1786.2s] That seems like a pretty good one.
[1788.4s] Can more than one person enter through that passageway?
[1792.8s] Yeah, it looks like you can go through it as long as it's open.
[1796.3s] Interesting.
[1797.6s] OK, yeah, he will he will cast pass wall on the wall.
[1803.4s] Explain to me how that looks when he casts that spell.
[1806.6s] He grabs a pinch of sesame seeds out of his spell component category,
[1811.8s] which he usually keeps for when he's making stew and various other things,
[1816.2s] you know, add a little texture into something.
[1818.9s] And he mutters a few words under his breath.
[1823.1s] And all of a sudden, there is a fucking hole in the wall.
[1827.3s] Does he say open sesame?
[1830.4s] That is why there's sesame seeds.
[1831.9s] I'm 100 percent convinced.
[1833.8s] Oh, God, that's why it's sesame seeds.
[1837.2s] That's hilarious.
[1839.0s] Open sesame.
[1841.1s] So a hole is there.
[1842.5s] Does he take any movement action or is that what he does?
[1845.7s] He might as well make his way out.
[1847.8s] Sure.
[1848.4s] Thea, it's up.
[1849.4s] It's your turn.
[1850.3s] It's up to you.
[1852.6s] Steam begins filtering out and up.
[1855.6s] How close am I to the kettle?
[1857.7s] You're within 10 feet of it.
[1859.4s] OK, I go to the kettle and I peer inside.
[1864.3s] I think there is like a gem or stone we need to get here.
[1867.0s] So you lift the bedroll off of it, yes?
[1869.2s] Oh, right.
[1869.8s] Because there's a bedroll on top of it.
[1871.4s] OK, I go to...
[1872.3s] There's covered in pee.
[1873.8s] Oh, God.
[1877.6s] OK, first I go over to investigate the coals.
[1882.6s] They appear to be burning embers.
[1885.3s] Do I see any stones or anything inside the burning embers?
[1888.9s] I know.
[1889.8s] No.
[1890.6s] Well, I mean, there's stones underneath.
[1892.3s] I mean, like any precious gems like an emerald or a diamond.
[1897.4s] You see nothing of the sort in the embers.
[1901.1s] OK, I feel like there's something to solve here.
[1904.2s] I take my, I don't know, my scimitar and I take off the bedroll from the thing
[1916.1s] and I look inside the pot.
[1918.6s] The top does not remove.
[1920.3s] There's no...
[1921.0s] Oh, what?
[1922.3s] It does not come off.
[1923.3s] There's a lid to it?
[1925.2s] Does not come off.
[1925.9s] And it doesn't come off?
[1927.1s] No.
[1928.2s] Why?
[1928.9s] It looks at you and scowls more.
[1930.8s] I scowl back at it.
[1934.3s] Fine.
[1936.6s] I say, hey, Flint, can I borrow your axe?
[1939.9s] Sure, yeah.
[1941.0s] I toss her the axe.
[1943.5s] I imagine it's like this.
[1946.6s] Make a dexterity saving throw.
[1948.1s] Do you really have to toss it at me?
[1950.2s] Well, I like underhand it to you.
[1952.5s] Well, you underhanded.
[1954.1s] It's probably going to chop off my foot.
[1956.7s] Dexterity check.
[1960.8s] Yeah, so you stumble with it because, you know, you've never...
[1963.8s] I don't know if you've ever actually held his axe.
[1965.7s] No, I doubt it.
[1966.3s] So, I mean, the weight of it throws you off a little bit
[1969.6s] and you kind of stumble back.
[1971.0s] What are you doing with his axe?
[1973.2s] I want to hit this thing.
[1974.2s] We haven't actually tried to harm it.
[1976.4s] You know, just want to see.
[1978.6s] Steve, all hell breaks loose.
[1980.5s] Make an attack roll, press strength.
[1983.2s] I don't know if you have proficiency with...
[1985.1s] I do not have proficiency with it.
[1987.0s] No.
[1989.3s] You can turn it into a sword if you'd prefer a sword.
[1992.1s] Oh, sorry, did you throw your axe axe or your Rod of Lordly Might?
[1995.3s] Because that's attuned to you.
[1997.8s] Oh, well, then I'll just give her the giant axe,
[2000.1s] which is why she would stumble with it.
[2001.4s] That makes more sense.
[2002.6s] Yeah.
[2004.6s] 16 plus strength.
[2007.8s] 18.
[2009.0s] OK, you connect with it.
[2010.4s] Roll damage.
[2011.4s] I don't know.
[2012.2s] What is the damage for an axe?
[2015.0s] That axe was 2d12 plus seven.
[2020.6s] I don't think I get the plus.
[2022.2s] You get 2d12 plus two.
[2024.9s] It was a real beast.
[2026.8s] I rolled a 12.
[2028.4s] Excellent.
[2029.5s] And a three, so it's 15 plus two.
[2032.1s] Yeah.
[2033.2s] 17.
[2033.7s] You heave down with this huge axe and it cracks open,
[2041.1s] and you see a bright light shoot out of this kettle.
[2046.5s] The walls immediately drop with a huge
[2050.2s] and up from the ground rises a huge stone dayo
[2054.6s] who looks very scowly, not like the man you just saw,
[2057.9s] who was quite pleasant.
[2060.7s] Before he tried to kill us.
[2062.9s] Right?
[2064.0s] And on the ground in the kettle is, in fact, a jade gemstone.
[2070.7s] Can I grab it?
[2071.2s] Sitting in the rubble of the teapot.
[2073.3s] Not before you're going to get swung at by a big dayo.
[2076.6s] But I get to stab it first, right?
[2079.0s] Yeah, you do.
[2079.7s] You sure do.
[2081.2s] Way to have your action ready.
[2082.0s] So rising up from the ground,
[2083.7s] more or less in front of you because it's not a huge area.
[2086.7s] Yeah, you can strike out at the dayo.
[2088.7s] I imagine, does Thaddeus turn around when the walls come down like, well.
[2091.7s] Spell slot.
[2095.4s] Like, oh, god, fuck.
[2098.3s] That's a 15.
[2101.9s] It glances off its arm and does not do any damage.
[2106.3s] Seems legit.
[2107.3s] It is a giant stone elemental.
[2110.6s] And I yell, sorry, you guys, I had to.
[2113.7s] And the dayo with the scowl on swings at you with its maul
[2119.5s] Twicely.
[2122.4s] Twings at me?
[2123.5s] Yeah, because you broke its thing.
[2126.8s] First one for a 12.
[2128.8s] Second one for an 18.
[2134.0s] It's a lot of sound effects with that maul.
[2135.7s] Yeah, I'm trying to I'm trying to just keep the action going here.
[2139.7s] It's 28 bludgeoning damage.
[2141.5s] Son of a bitch.
[2143.1s] Jesus.
[2144.3s] Hey there.
[2149.3s] I'm your dungeon master, Ross More.
[2150.9s] Thank you for joining us for episode 51 of Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[2154.2s] Come for the maze, stay for the tea.
[2156.5s] If you're liking what we're doing and you want to help make
[2158.7s] Dumbgeons and Dragons better with each episode, then check us out on Patreon.
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[2169.9s] Plus, with our Patreon support, we've been able to get our bookings in
[2173.9s] for PodCon 2 in Seattle in January.
[2176.6s] Can't wait for that.
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[2200.7s] So go check out the website and join, follow, or like where you can today.
[2204.4s] And thanks to Sirenscape for some of the amazing atmosphere in this episode.
[2207.1s] Make sure you check them out at sirenscape.com to bring your games to life.
[2211.1s] Links for everything mentioned today can be found in the description below.
[2215.9s] The next episode will be on Wednesday, September 5th,
[2218.4s] and it's high time we get back to this episode.
[2221.1s] Have a great week.
[2222.1s] We'll talk soon.
[2223.7s] The sorry 2828 bludgeoning damage.
[2231.9s] And this is like I'm pretty sure he said 2.8.
[2233.9s] This is a this is a large elemental.
[2236.6s] So he stands seems like five or eight feet taller than you.
[2242.7s] Like he is huge.
[2244.3s] Flamikins Kins is up next.
[2246.3s] Then she's like, well, fuck, that's weird shit, guys.
[2250.3s] Um, you know, I did bring it on myself.
[2252.7s] Oh, guys, I don't know.
[2254.6s] I'm going to I'm going to try and cast Maximillian's Earthen Grasp.
[2260.6s] Oh, ground, do what you got to do.
[2263.9s] And I hold this hand sculpted thing and a five foot square right beside the do.
[2270.7s] You can see a medium hand made from compacted soil and stone rises
[2278.8s] and reaches for the creature, and it must make a strength saving throw.
[2286.3s] I bet it's pretty strong.
[2288.1s] It probably is really bad strength guys didn't roll really well.
[2292.9s] That's in that's a 10, which I think fails, but sure does.
[2297.5s] So it's going to take two d six bludgeoning damage and be restrained.
[2302.3s] Oh, yeah.
[2302.9s] Restraint is good.
[2304.0s] So that's going to be nine bludgeoning damage.
[2307.6s] OK, and then it is back to Nulara.
[2312.1s] Sweet.
[2313.8s] I am going to use a bonus action to cast ensnaring strike.
[2324.8s] That only means something happens if I then hit this creature with my attack.
[2329.8s] So I'm going to attack it with my sword.
[2334.4s] Yep.
[2336.7s] That is a 25 that will hit it.
[2340.7s] And you have advantage because it's restrained.
[2342.7s] So even if.
[2346.3s] So that is 20 damage.
[2349.9s] Oh, and then something else happens with that spell.
[2353.6s] OK, are you going to tell us what it is?
[2355.3s] I like that this is all broken down into stages.
[2359.9s] Hey, I'm trying new things.
[2361.1s] I'm ready.
[2361.4s] No, I like it.
[2362.1s] I'm casting bonus actions.
[2363.7s] It's like I'm actually trying to play Dumbgeons and Dragons, you guys.
[2366.6s] It's crazy.
[2367.6s] You nail it.
[2368.3s] I like it.
[2368.7s] I love it.
[2369.5s] Oh, well.
[2373.1s] Does it get locked in place now?
[2376.4s] He's restrained.
[2377.9s] Yeah, double restrained, but he's now he's double secret restrained.
[2383.2s] So does he have to double restrained twice to break out?
[2387.2s] Sorry.
[2387.5s] Is there any it just happens if on a strike or is there any saving throw for it?
[2391.5s] He has to succeed on a strength savings throw.
[2397.8s] Immediately or on his turn?
[2399.5s] I think next time, Riding Mass of Thorny Vines appears at the point of impact.
[2405.6s] Target must succeed on a strength saving throw or be restrained by magical vines until
[2410.0s] the spell ends.
[2411.4s] So that's going to be a 15, which would be your spell saved against your Spell
[2416.3s] Save DC top of your spells page.
[2418.9s] Yep, let's.
[2420.1s] Yep, 15.
[2421.1s] So he's still restrained, but there's just not by you, but not double restrained.
[2426.6s] Yeah, not double restrained.
[2427.5s] There are some vines that appeared and then shriveled away when he fLexed, I guess.
[2433.8s] But that's OK.
[2434.6s] I still get to attack him again.
[2436.2s] So all is lost.
[2439.1s] Is it just on a single attack or is it like a duration effect?
[2442.7s] I think it is just.
[2445.9s] What was the spell, sorry?
[2447.1s] In snaring strike bonus action concentration up to a minute.
[2450.3s] So you can keep going on it as long as you're concentrating on it.
[2453.2s] So just not casting another concentration spell.
[2455.5s] So every attack you make will have that effect as well.
[2458.5s] OK, well, it'll just get smothered in vines by the end.
[2461.3s] Worst case, it'll just be surrounded by them.
[2464.1s] That is a 20 on my second attack.
[2468.7s] So that is 7 plus 6 is 13 damage.
[2473.8s] The in snaring strike is a 13 this time.
[2476.2s] Oh, so then he is now double secret restrained.
[2479.1s] Double secret restrained.
[2480.0s] He's got some vines on him, too.
[2481.8s] All right.
[2482.3s] Donnie is going to go.
[2483.9s] Donnie, I can't remember if he recharged, so I'll roll because I didn't write it down.
[2488.8s] I mean, I did, but it's like four pages back in notes.
[2491.1s] So he's going to he rolled a six, so he redid it anyway.
[2497.9s] He is going to go with weakening breath.
[2506.0s] I sounded confident, right?
[2507.6s] I feel like I feel like fire isn't the best bet against this stone guy.
[2511.9s] That's all I was thinking.
[2513.5s] Well, yeah, weaken him.
[2514.5s] He has to succeed on a DC 13 strength saving throw
[2520.0s] or have disadvantage on strength based attack rolls,
[2524.0s] strength checks and strength savings throws for one minute.
[2527.5s] That's a natural 20.
[2528.7s] Whoa.
[2529.2s] OK, I know all that.
[2530.8s] Jesus.
[2532.6s] Well, I tried.
[2533.8s] So Donnie lets forth his weakening breath.
[2537.1s] What is his weakening breath look like?
[2539.0s] It's just like it's like wavy way back lines,
[2543.2s] but, you know, straight like, you know, the ones, you know, wavy lines.
[2548.3s] So as the day is pulling at the ground and the vines that are holding it down,
[2554.0s] it's like fighting against these these wavy lines now,
[2559.8s] but manages to fight those off.
[2562.3s] Flint, you're up.
[2563.4s] You have advantage on attacks.
[2565.4s] Well, in that case, I might as well attack.
[2570.3s] Otherwise, you were going to try.
[2571.7s] I was just going to I was going to wet some more blankets
[2575.2s] and throw them on top of them.
[2576.4s] So I thought it was a good idea, guys.
[2580.7s] I thought it was a good idea.
[2582.7s] First one is a 22.
[2584.3s] So that should hit.
[2588.9s] Why are you being all sassy about it?
[2593.9s] That is nine plus.
[2596.4s] What do I add again here?
[2597.8s] Seven.
[2598.4s] There we go.
[2598.9s] Sixteen damage on the first one.
[2601.3s] Yeah.
[2602.6s] OK.
[2605.3s] It's a 22 on the second one.
[2607.2s] So we'll roll more damage.
[2609.9s] That's seven plus seven.
[2611.2s] So that's 14.
[2616.7s] And 19 on the third attack.
[2619.5s] That still hits.
[2621.0s] And a full 10 plus seven is 17.
[2625.5s] Oh, yeah.
[2626.5s] OK, so Stone begins to chip off of his exteriors.
[2630.3s] You're hacking at.
[2631.8s] Damn right it does.
[2633.9s] Thaddeus is up and slightly out of the pagoda.
[2638.3s] Are you staying in position?
[2640.0s] Are you moving or I guess you don't want to move?
[2642.1s] I mean, I might as well just stay where I am.
[2644.3s] Yeah, sure.
[2645.1s] Thaddeus hasn't noticed that anything is happening yet.
[2648.3s] Is he is he facing looking at like, I got us.
[2651.3s] I did this and behind him.
[2653.0s] He's just enjoying a big, deep breath of fresh air.
[2655.4s] Yeah, I'm so excited he's not breathing the pee air anymore.
[2659.1s] He is going to throw some magic missiles back in through his open doorway.
[2664.4s] Sure.
[2665.1s] And there is no open doorway.
[2667.4s] It's yeah, there's no way.
[2669.2s] I guess not anymore.
[2670.2s] Yeah.
[2671.9s] Way to ruin my funds.
[2673.7s] Yeah.
[2673.9s] Thanks for ruining my funds.
[2675.4s] Yeah.
[2675.6s] I'm well, I won.
[2677.2s] I thought you were supposed to be the wet blanket.
[2679.0s] No, I blame Russ for ruining my fund.
[2681.8s] Oh, Russ is the wet blanket.
[2683.5s] Yeah, true.
[2685.9s] He rolled a 19 before any bonuses, so I'm pretty sure he's good.
[2690.6s] Yeah, you're fine.
[2691.1s] Sorry.
[2691.3s] What does he do?
[2691.9s] Any magic?
[2692.3s] Oh, magic just hits, dude.
[2693.9s] Oh, right.
[2694.5s] We discussed that last time.
[2695.5s] It's magic.
[2696.3s] Yeah.
[2696.6s] Yeah.
[2697.3s] OK, so that's three and four is seven and two is nine damage.
[2704.1s] Yeah, take it.
[2706.3s] Yeah.
[2706.6s] It's my turn.
[2708.9s] Yeah.
[2710.7s] Thea is going to cast Eldritch Blast, and since so it says ranged spell attack,
[2721.6s] I have to roll, right?
[2722.9s] Yeah, but you have advantage.
[2725.0s] I do.
[2726.1s] Thank God.
[2727.9s] I know I need it.
[2728.9s] That's an 11 plus eight, 19.
[2734.4s] With advantage.
[2735.2s] Yeah, you might get a crit on your next one.
[2737.7s] Oh, you're right.
[2738.3s] I'm just always always roll both if you have the option.
[2742.0s] Not 16.
[2742.7s] Nine.
[2743.0s] Well, 19 is your high, so that hits.
[2744.6s] OK, so I'm going to create a crackling, three crackling energy streaks,
[2751.1s] and I'm going to aim it right into the middle of this big rocky bastard,
[2756.5s] and he's going to get three D10 force damage.
[2760.7s] Nice.
[2761.8s] Yeah.
[2763.1s] Yeah.
[2764.3s] There it is.
[2765.0s] Let's see.
[2765.4s] Where's my dice?
[2768.1s] Do me right, dice.
[2769.1s] Come on.
[2771.9s] You did me right.
[2773.7s] OK, the nine and nine is 18 plus two is 20.
[2776.9s] There you go.
[2778.1s] Nice.
[2778.8s] 20 damage.
[2779.7s] 20 damage.
[2780.6s] Wow.
[2781.2s] Right?
[2781.5s] You did damage.
[2782.6s] I did damage.
[2783.6s] You done good.
[2785.1s] You know what that was?
[2787.5s] That was a cantrip.
[2789.1s] No spell thoughts wasted.
[2792.7s] Eldritch Blast is an awesome one.
[2795.0s] It really is.
[2795.7s] I'm really happy that I that I chose that.
[2798.0s] It's good because it like levels up as you level, which is wicked sauce.
[2802.3s] It does.
[2803.0s] Next time at 17th level, I get four beams.
[2806.8s] Yeah, you can direct them all at one or all at different targets.
[2810.4s] If that's fun.
[2812.3s] So, yeah, you it rocks are shooting off of it.
[2817.4s] And then as that happens, you hold on.
[2821.5s] I also sneak down and I pick up the gem because you didn't let me last time.
[2826.2s] I didn't because your turn was over.
[2827.5s] Well, yeah, I I sneakily pick it up and pocket it.
[2830.3s] Yeah, the ground beneath the day begins to like create a wave and it moves out
[2837.5s] and he gets sucked into it and up right in front of Thea.
[2842.7s] Tricky, tricky escaping and swings his maul down for a 25 and a 26 to attack.
[2851.5s] I'm going to die.
[2853.0s] You got this.
[2853.7s] You're fine.
[2857.1s] How can he do that if he was restrained?
[2860.3s] Because he like sucks back into the earth out of the vines.
[2862.7s] He's no longer.
[2863.6s] He went like underneath and moved all the ground.
[2866.4s] So Maximilian's earth and grass was like and the vines disappeared.
[2871.3s] Seems shady magic.
[2875.4s] First one is 16 bludgeoning damage.
[2878.6s] Second one is 26 bludgeoning damage as the maul crunches down once and then crunches down again.
[2886.0s] Make a strength saving throw.
[2887.7s] Oh, my God.
[2888.4s] Guys, I'm at 16 hit points isn't good.
[2893.9s] 12, 13.
[2895.5s] You are knocked prone.
[2897.4s] I want to use my inspiration to reroll.
[2901.3s] I mean, you're supposed to do that before I tell you whether you do it.
[2904.1s] But I'll let you do it.
[2905.1s] That's fine.
[2905.7s] I knew it wasn't going to be good.
[2907.3s] Well, then you always use your inspiration.
[2910.8s] Are you speaking Celestial DeRosa right now?
[2913.1s] 21.
[2914.8s] 21.
[2916.3s] OK, so you're not knocked prone, but you almost were.
[2921.9s] But you took two huge crunches.
[2926.3s] The Deo glides 20 feet to the edge of this island that's in this pool here.
[2935.0s] And it's Flamekin's turn.
[2942.3s] Stones are not my forte being a pirate.
[2945.2s] Don't let him get away, Flamekins.
[2946.7s] Don't let him get away.
[2947.8s] OK, well, I can cast a big gust of wind.
[2955.9s] What do we think about that?
[2957.5s] Dude, you got a good girl.
[2958.8s] I'm going to fucking try it.
[2960.4s] OK, I don't know if it's going to hold on.
[2962.9s] Is that going to be good?
[2963.8s] Yeah, sure.
[2965.8s] Oh, that's not going to be good.
[2967.8s] OK, harmless.
[2968.8s] You create a harmless sensory effect using air such as causing leaves to rustle.
[2973.5s] Maybe I won't do that, guys.
[2975.2s] But those leaves can be real scary.
[2978.1s] Rustling leaves.
[2979.5s] I'm out of third level spell slots, so that's not going to be good.
[2982.3s] Flamekins can't.
[2983.3s] I don't know.
[2985.5s] Oh, fuck yeah.
[2986.4s] Can you throw something at him?
[2988.1s] Do you have a sword?
[2989.9s] Do you have some arrows?
[2991.4s] Oh, yeah, I got arrows.
[2995.0s] Sometimes it's not all about magic, Flamekins.
[2998.1s] I'm going to shoot my light crossbow at it.
[3001.7s] That's going to be 19.
[3005.8s] That'll hit.
[3008.8s] For 10 piercing damage.
[3010.5s] You're doing it all in Flamekin's voice.
[3012.2s] That's very interesting.
[3013.8s] Hmm.
[3015.0s] She is in game and out of game.
[3016.8s] She's everywhere.
[3017.7s] I don't even know where rust stops and Flamekins begins.
[3021.1s] I love that you say Flamekins.
[3022.7s] That's just how I like to say it.
[3024.4s] The crossbow bolt wedges into a cracked joint that was created by Flint's hammering
[3031.4s] and shoots off a huge stone off this thing's side.
[3036.4s] Nulara.
[3038.2s] How far away is it from me?
[3039.5s] Oh, I guess it can't be that far.
[3040.8s] It's like 20.
[3042.3s] 20 feet tops.
[3044.1s] Well, then I'm going to go and stab it.
[3047.5s] Do it.
[3048.0s] Stab it.
[3049.5s] Kill it for me, Nulara.
[3051.5s] 19.
[3055.8s] 18 damage.
[3058.3s] Tell me what happens when you kill the Dale.
[3063.2s] I think that I saw where Flamekins like that there was a spot, you know,
[3070.8s] a weakening spot.
[3071.9s] So that is where I aim with the Dragon Slayer.
[3075.3s] So I guess I stab him in the kidney.
[3079.0s] The kidney stone.
[3080.1s] There's some kind of joke here, guys.
[3083.8s] So you take a running start at this and we'll say it sees you coming
[3088.2s] and begins to swing its maul but you slide underneath and just jab in with your sword
[3094.0s] and then it looks down at you with a deep hurt scowl and then explodes.
[3100.2s] Rock dust everywhere.
[3103.5s] Raining down along the Pagoda Island.
[3107.9s] I slow clap and I reach into my bag and I take ruby dust between my fingers
[3114.3s] and put it on my cheeks and mutter an incantation.
[3118.5s] What's the incantation?
[3119.9s] Everybody's muttering lots of things.
[3121.2s] What's the incantation?
[3125.2s] It fucking hurts.
[3127.4s] And I heal 70 hit points.
[3132.5s] 70? What the fuck did you use?
[3134.6s] I healed, I used a sixth level spell called Heal where I choose a creature
[3140.5s] in a surge of positive energy washes through me causing me to regain 70 hit points.
[3145.4s] It also ends blindness, deafness, and any other diseases affected by the target.
[3149.2s] Well, I mean you could have been blinded.
[3151.0s] There were some big heavy hits.
[3152.7s] I stand up and I brush myself off like kind of embarrassed.
[3157.5s] I almost died.
[3159.0s] Like, well that was shitty.
[3161.0s] Okay, let's go.
[3163.0s] And you see the doorway open up leading into a pathway beyond this area that you're in.
[3170.1s] I reach into my pocket and I take out the what kind of stone was it again?
[3173.7s] Jade? Jade gemstone.
[3176.4s] And I have like a little like oh and I put it back in my pocket
[3181.5s] because jade my serpentine into my owl.
[3186.3s] Get it together.
[3187.1s] Oh my god, I'm sorry.
[3188.8s] We got to get out of here to get your owl back.
[3192.3s] Jesus.
[3193.6s] So you begin walking down the pathway and you enter back into the sundial room
[3199.3s] where the sundial shadows are remaining to be pointed at A, D, and F.
[3207.8s] Holy fuck.
[3209.6s] We're gonna be in here forever.
[3224.5s] Music in today's episode was by Kavin McLeod of incompetech.filmmusic.io
[3230.0s] Uh, this is um, this is not, this is not tea guys.
[3235.8s] This is uh, where the fuck did the thing go?
[3239.1s] Shit.
[3242.3s] Where's all my dice that I gotta roll?
[3246.7s] We're off to my mine.
[3247.9s] They don't roll real good.
[3249.0s] Yeah, they're real good.
[3252.5s] Use Amy's when you attack us.
[3253.9s] Russ, just use Amy's.
[3255.1s] You should use Amy's.
[3256.7s] Just use Amy's, Russ.
[3257.8s] Where'd my dice go?
[3259.6s] Amy's, Amy hid them on you so you'd have to use hers.
[3263.5s] Is he bigger or smaller than Ben Grimm?
[3267.1s] Who's his name?
[3268.9s] Ben Grimm?
[3270.5s] Yep.
[3272.1s] I don't actually know how tall he is.
[3273.5s] I just wanted to say a comic book thing.
[3275.9s] Oh.
[3276.9s] How'd I do?
[3277.5s] Tom, did I get it right?
[3278.7s] Yeah, you totally got it right.
[3279.8s] His name is Ben Grimm.
[3282.2s] Oh, the thing.
[3283.6s] I get it.
[3283.9s] Come on, Russ.
[3284.7s] It's a giant rock, man.
[3285.9s] I missed it.
[3286.9s] I missed it.
[3288.2s] I was busy destroying Theo over here.
[3290.6s] That's true.
[3291.5s] Couldn't remember if it was 13 or 16.
[3295.2s] Did you break my chair?
[3296.3s] No, I broke my arm.
[3297.4s] Oh, no.
[3297.9s] This is not the chair.
[3301.0s] Please tell me the chair's OK.
[3304.0s] Not the IKEA chair.
[3305.9s] I put together one of these backwards the first time.
[3308.9s] I almost threw it through the fucking window.
[3310.9s] It was so mad.
[3312.1s] I did the rest, I think.
[3313.4s] Yeah, it was real mad.
[3315.4s] Guys, I'm out of rum.
[3317.4s] I'm getting kind of surly.
[3319.8s] I mean, a little bit.
[3321.1s] I'm doing it.
[3322.0s] Russ is web blunted.
[3322.8s] I need a second rum.
[3326.5s] Let's go.
[3327.1s] And you see an opening open up.
[3330.7s] That's a terrible way to describe it.
[3332.2s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.